Apologies for the lack of new items to all – sorry, both – of sitegeist’s readers. If anyone asks, I’ve done my bit for the writer’s strike taking place across the pond, and therefore have been unable to sit and write anything worthy of note.Not that there’s no news out there – heaven forbid. Problem is, everything that has possibly been written about England, Steve McClaren and the state of the national game has already been written. Shame on whoever it is to blame, seems to be the general message.
What’s been quite amusing to observe through all of these epitaphs for the country (Queen Victoria’s “lie back and think of England” has taken on a whole new context) is the trend of turning aggressive opinion in to what appears to be a half-time team talk to the nation.
Recently, I’ve become a big fan of Pro Evolution Soccer. The Playstation game is a firm favourite for weekday lunchtimes, and I’m absolutely hopeless at it. I’m often given a thorough roasting, yet I still love it, as boys will be boys and computer games will indeed be computer games.
Like all other football games, Pro Evo has developed itself to be sold not just as an action-sports game, but also one of tactics. Aeons are spent trying to marshal the players in to their optimum formation, dragging and dropping individuals in to their best position, what part of the pitch they should cover, comparing player abilities against similar team members using complex graphs, and whether or not you should just play long ball and hope for the best.
Another game, Championship Manager, goes one better – here you’re involved with the more day-to-day hive of activity you can expect as the gaffer; everything from training, team discipline, transfers and whether or not you should actually admit to the board you actually just play long ball and hope for the best.
And herein lies the problem. While everybody huddled around their Playstations trying desperately to make data-configurated statistics (represented on their screens as Nigel Reo-Coker) give them the win they crave, they sincerely believe they’ve got the entire England team sussed. Of course, armchair managers aren’t a new thing. For decades, the bloke collective would demonstrate their failsafe starting XI for their team, but with the advent of tactical gamers making them believe they’ve got the entire team sussed, we’re all smacking our heads in disbelief, wondering if McClaren still only has his copy of FIFA ’96 on his PC.
